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You know how this goes.

You have a painful experience with someone.  

You think about it.  You think about it more.

You can’t focus on other things you need to get done.  You just can’t let it go.

And each time you think about it, you get that same gut-wrenching feeling.

How do you move out of that sense that you’ll never ditch the feeling?  Like you’re always going to have a cloud hanging over your head?

Here’s what works for me… 

Be with the gut feeling.  You are entitled to feel whatever you feel, just like you’re entitled to move out of that whenever you are ready.

But keep on reading if you’re ready.

What did the experience trigger in you?  Usually gut feelings like that are about deep emotion connected to a boundary or a need.  What was the boundary that was crossed?  What do you know you need that you weren’t getting?

Love yourself through this.  Take a time out, in nature or in the spa.

Forgive yourself for whatever you think your responsibility is.  You’ll make it right because chances are the other person’s boundaries need to be lovingly honoured just like yours do.

Let it go.

We don’t always get it right, but like all other experiences, this is a learning one.

What can you do going forward that will honour your boundaries before it becomes so painful for you?

What can you do to learn to honour other’s boundaries before it becomes so painful for them?

Sometimes shit happens and life just gets messy!  

If you get stuck, you can always call me and we’ll coach it out!

Get to know your boundaries on an intimate basis so you can stand up for yourself with love and respect.

If you don’t, who else will?

 

Got boundaries that need some air?  Leave a comment below!

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For fierce love and ass-kicking
Dianna Leeder is
thewomenscoach@cravemorelife.com