Hey diy ass-kicker!
I was out the other morning, having a leisurely breakies with my significant other. Breakies out is a regular happening for us. It’s a great way to start a day off with plenty of coffee, food and gab, without having to cook!
We were in one of those little diners, where all the tables are squished closely together. You know the kind of place where the food is great but the waiter’s butt is uncomfortably close to you as they serve the people beside you.
This particular day a couple of women sat down beside us. They were a tad on the loud side, not that much conversation is sacred in such a small space but it was very hard to tune them out and focus on our own exchange.
And I have to say, even though what people talk about is truly none of my business, I found myself getting annoyed.
Because their conversation was all about other people. Other women actually.
“She did this.”
“She didn’t do that.”
“How dare she?”
“And now she expects me to”.
…blah, blah, blah.
It annoyed me that so much time and energy was being wasted on someone other than themselves.
In our world, when our sense of self has taken a beating or our life-provided challenges feel too tough for us to face head on, we look for other places to let our shit fly. And we all know that there is always an easy target somewhere around us to go after. After all, none of us are perfect.
But where does that leave us? What does it do for us?
Well, we might be a bit relieved that we’ve been able to get rid of some pent up steam. Or maybe we feel a closer connection with whoever we were talking with, who needed to vent about someone else that day too. Only you know the answer to that.
The reality is that behaviour or action (even just a conversation) based on someone else will only take you in repetitive circles and never leave you feeling better about yourself for any length of time. Bitch and repeat.
If you see yourself in this post, don’t take it as a reason to feel guilty. Take it as a reason to step up for yourself. Leave those other people who don’t treat you well to find their own happiness, while you ride the wave of being the woman you want to be, in ways that make you feel good about yourself.
Favour? Start noticing conversations either you are expected to participate in, or that you initiate.
How do you feel in the midst of it? What does the outcome do for you? How do you feel about yourself afterwards?
There is a fuck of a lot more to life than calling out other people, especially fellow women.
Let’s start building each other up instead.
Starting with ourselves.