Can We Please Just Stop Saying This Shit?
Hey diy Ass-kickers!
Dianna here.
Have you noticed that we sometimes say untruthful shit outloud.
Shit that has us shrinking into a powerless version of ourselves.
Shit that comes from our fear of offending someone, or of letting someone know that we actually HAVE A DIFFERENT OPINION.
Shit that doesn’t serve us in any way, shape or form.
Here are two of my all time (less than) favs…
“I’m sorry.”
and
“It’s ok.”
Honestly, I really hate seeing women putting themselves in a corner.
And unlike the Dirty Dancing movie, the hot dancer guy is not going to come and pull you from that corner so you can shine.
But WTF? Who needs him anyway? You can do it yourself!
And that’s important to know because while you’re stuck in saying you’re sorry for bothering other people for breathing, or saying that certain behaviors toward you are ok when they actually suck, you’re not growing.
You’re letting yourself stay small, which is not likely what you want, nor is it what your purpose is on this earth. All because you perceive others as being more powerful than you.
You’re fetal-ing. Yes, I just made that word up so don’t bother googling it. It’s my way of saying that you’re curled up in a fetal position, and if that gives you a sense of comfort, you might want to think harder about it.
Think about all the things that you have to say. All the things that you want to do. All the things that you want to be. All the things you want to experience.
You can’t do much if you are curled up in a ball, even if it feels safe there.
Know that you might not even be aware that your language is representing how you feel about yourself in relation to others. You may have been saying those two things for so long that they have become your default statements.
But even though you may not be aware of your part in keeping yourself curled up, there is no doubt to me that you feel it.
Every time you hand your power over to someone else, it’s like another layer of saran wrap that is holding you tighter and smaller.
Lets be clear. There are no martyrs in the land of happy.
Making yourself look and feel smaller will not get you the life that makes you feel good, even when you think you are doing it for others.
And isn’t that what we all want? To simply feel good about ourselves and our existence? I know that’s my big fat hairy brass ring. And ya, I just mixed up metaphors.
Can we just not for awhile?
Can we stop apologizing for who we are, what we think, or what we do?
Can we stop telling the world that we’re OK when we’re sad or pissed off?
Can we start taking the time to understand what we stand for and what we value?
Can we use that to determine our boundaries and make a firm commitment to ourselves that we will not let them get shoved aside?
Our gender construct can lead to us to feel less than and unable to step up for ourselves. The glass ceiling is still there, ladies. When we’re down, we’re down and it can seem like every emotional shit-kicking is aimed right at us. Shifting out of that can be bloody hard.
But I know you can do it. Tons of women have chosen to be themselves and go after the happy by not making themselves small.
Can you start to be one of them? I just starts with a decision.
And then tell me so I can celebrate with you.
I’d love that!.