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“How to Start Finding Your Voice”

Are you using your voice out loud?

Feeling the shame of not using your voice? It’s not your fault.

by | Sep 5, 2021 | Advice, Coaching, Find Your Voice

It frigging happens.
We feel shame when we don’t use our voices or when we can’t use our voices.
How shitty is that? Even a little struggle to use our voices can hold us back from asking for what we need or want. Even a little fear can keep us from getting the experiences that we know we need to be completely self aligned.
Why should we have to be ashamed at all?
Social media tells us that we can take charge, right? We can stand up and say our peice anytime we need to. And we can, but that’s not the real life messages we get.
  • Take the blame over blaming someone else.
  • Be a good girl.
  • Forgive people you don’t want to forgive.
  • Do that thing for that person whenever they ask.
  • Keep quiet when you think what you want to say will rock the boat.
  • You are responsible for everyone else’s feelings.

And that’s only a few. (Bet you’ve got more!) We’ve come a long way, but not that far…yet.

Shame can happen when we don’t use our voices. We question our own value and worth, taking us inside our heads and changing the direction of where we truly want to go. Our heads can be an unkind place.

Who are we to stand up against popular opinion? Who are we to put ourselves first? We’re just not that important or worth the effort.

It’s those real life messages that end up guiding our beliefs about ourselves and therefore our behaviour.

Here’s my question…

Are you gonna let it?

Are you gonna let yourself be a prisoner to what some old fart (no offence to older people, I’m one of them) standards of what a woman can and can’t do?

I’m going to suggest a resounding NO.

A NO without shame or pressure to conform. A NO that opens up your world to asking or even demanding exactly what you need to live like you matter.

Where do you need to practice that this week?

Challenge…head to my FB group Find Your Voice Women (if you’re not already a member, give me a minute to let you in) and post about your favourite old school concept about women that STILLLLL holds us back, things you say NO to.

I can’t wait to see the NO’s to each and every one!

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