Word NO

Hey diy Ass-kickers!
I gotta story to tell you.
I have recently taken up swimming and I love, love, love it. 
I swam a lot as a kid but was feeling the need to up my technique some so I could model safe swimming for my grand babies, or should I call them water babies. Plus, this girl bod of mine was telling me to take my movement down a notch to something more gentle than hitting the pavement every day, so I’m on it. At least for awhile anyway, I love my early morning runs.  
Back to swimming. So I registered for some swim lessons, got super hyped about it, only to have one of the shittiest customer service experiences I have every had. Seriously. I won’t go into all the deets, you would be bored silly, but here is the part that really made me mad.
One of my instructors was a young woman just out of high school. A bright and personable woman headed to University to study engineering. As we connected, she revealed the she was not really a certified swimming instructor at all, she had been hired for the summer as a life guard. And she felt very uncomfortable teaching adults and kids (including infants) in the several classes that she had been asked to lead by her supervisor.
At this point I’m getting pissed. I’m a pretty strong swimmer and I was able to learn things by watching her technique in the water, but I was pissed at the position that she had been put in. 
So I asked what made her say yes?
Her response…
“I can’t say no.”
She went on to explain that it was hard for her to say no to her supervisor, and that she needed the job and the money it paid her for university. 
My heart went out to her of course, but I was even more pissed by that.
That young woman was being taken advantage of. 
And yes, I’m on that one like flies on shit with upper management at the facility. Employers have the responsibility to recognize the needs of the population they hire, and they shouldn’t be ‘effing around with young, impressionable women.
But there is still the issue of her feeling like she couldn’t say no. And that one is not reserved for young women. It happens at any age.
What are you saying yes to right now that you know isn’t ok? 
It may be something inappropriate, something unethical, illegal even. 
Or maybe it’s simply something that’s not OK for you. Maybe it’s something that you just don’t want to do, and that’s enough.
Your head and your inner mean girl will team up to tell you that you can’t say no. 
You should go with the flow. You’ll look like a wimp or worse if you say no. Whoever you want to say no to is a pretty strong person, you don’t have the guts to challenge them. You’ll lose your job. They won’t like you. They’ll judge you for not being a team player. And the list goes on.
But what does that feel like when you live under the veil of the fear of saying no?
No matter what your age or circumstances are, it’s time to change that shit up. 
You have the right, and the responsibility to yourself as a diy Ass-kicker, to say no to whatever you want to say no to. You are never cornered, because you’re not living your life for anyone else. Your life, your choices.
Hit up your deep core and figure out what’s important to you. In the case of my young “instructor”, her inability to say no was about what she told herself would happen if she did. Yet she knew, deep down, that saying yes was not the right thing to do for her. It’s letting fear rule.
Instead, make your decisions based on what your girl bod tells you is right for you by not giving you a headache, a blob in your gut, a feeling like you can’t breathe, or the runs. Pay close attention to your bod’s reactions when decision making, girls, it never lies.
Start today, right now. Because confidence is born from listening to your deep core values, and big time practice of honoring them. 

Stop peace-keeping. Because it’s not really peaceful for you. 
You get to make your choices based on what works for you. That doesn’t mean you’ll be mean or disrespectful because those things are important to you too.
I bet that if you think about it, you can come up with 5 things right now that you are saying a weak yes to but really want to be saying a strong no to. 
What can you start with? Make it a little one if you want, then as you get good at it, go after the big ones.
And keep an eye on this blog, ladies. 
This young woman has fired me up enough to create a free program on how to say no and love it!! Hit reply if it’s something that you think you could use.
And it will definitely begin with Meghan Trainor reminding us that when we know it’s right for us, our name, our sign, our number and our word is NO!