Today is my mom’s birthday, she would have been 91.
She’s been gone from earth for more than 25 years now, but I still think of her every single day, wondering what her new life is like, how much she would have loved to see all her kids grow up and have kids, and being grateful for all the amazing memories I have of her being my mom. (Thankfully I can still connect with her spiritually.)
When I think about her, I often consider how stressed out and physically unwell she was. She was a huge giver, always doing or helping someone, often to her very own detriment. She also suffered from angina, high blood pressure, gout, and lots of extra pounds.
Back then I didn’t understand that our body responds to our heads as much as it does, the whole connection between stress and physical/mental health. But now I do and I regret that she didn’t have that chance before cancer took it away.
She made choices based on her physical state. She couldn’t do this, she wouldn’t do that, she was perpetually tired, was never physically active, and relied on lots of comfort foods. I can only imagine how shitty she must have felt. And how trapped she felt by her own body.
That makes me so keen on noticing my body responses to stress, when they arrive and when they go away. I pay close attention to my physical self, not to give myself labels of some diseases, but as an indicator of what’s happening in my whole life.
Honestly, I’ve never been so aware of that link for myself before now, and it’s pretty crazy just how subtle our human bodies can be. I have learned to look at my existence as a whole instead of just where my body hurts.
So when I hear women say they can’t do something they have always longed to do, I share the reminder that while they may feel shitty now, maybe there are other places to look for healing so they can actually get back to where they were and to that thing they always longed to do.
Stress can be managed, it doesn’t have to hold us back.
That means getting to know our bodies well enough to notice when things change. And it also means understanding the stressors in our lives so we can see if there is a connection.
Your body is your freaking temple, lady. Of that, I have zero doubt.
So if your’s is being a bit of an ahole, consider what’s happening outside before you decide that you’re stuck.
Maybe if my mom had known that…
